I want to see the stars.

I have never understood how so many people can be content in a large city. Isolated from nature, surrounded by steel, asphalt, exhaust fumes, endless traffic and more people than there are trees. Or how people can enjoy living where you never get to hear how quiet the world can be, or where you can never see the stars.

I realized a long time ago that I was never meant for the cold hard streets of a city. I was never meant for traffic jams and crowds of strangers every day. I was never meant for the coldness and isolation of a big city where you can’t even enjoy a sunset unobstructed by skyscrapers.

Where I belong is in the wide-open spaces of a prairie field or steep incline of a mountainside. I belong where I can hear the coyotes barking in the distance, and the sound of crickets chirping at night. Where there may be fewer people but a far bigger community.

I want to see the stars and stroll along a road with nothing but the light of a full moon. I want to walk barefoot through the grass and smell the trees while I pick wildflowers. I want to hear the birds singing and see every color in those Charlie Russel sunsets.

I want to spend my evening holed up in a cabin in the woods reading a book in the quiet or around a bonfire surrounded by friends. I want to spend my free time writing and creating. Being a maker not a taker.

Maybe I was born in the wrong era, because in pretty sure I’m more hippie than millennial. In another world I probably would have been a nymph or a dryad… Maybe even one of the Tuatha Dé Danann.

And yet, while all of those things are true, and maybe I wasn’t meant for this era… I also want to jump on a plane and go explore Europe, see the Eiffel Tower, lay on a beach in the Carribean, be close enough to touch the band at a concert, and feel the power of the engines at a NASCAR race.

I suppose the truth of the matter is that I’m not someone who will ever fit into anyone’s box. I’m a free spirit in every sense of the word. There are countless layers to who I am, and I’m not sure even I have discovered them all just yet.

So maybe, just maybe, if you are a patient enough person, you will be able to slowly uncover the layers of who I am, learn a few of the quirks of my personality, and see the constant transformation that is happening in me. And maybe, just maybe, you will see who I am underneath all of the mistakes, flaws, scars, and failures… and still, somehow, manage to love the perfectly imperfect person that I am.

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